i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Randomize
