he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
