You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Randomize
