I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
