All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
my being single is dangerous.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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