She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
