yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize