And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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