I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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