ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
