I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
