I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
