Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
