She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Randomize
