btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
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