So drunk, too bad you don't want this
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
