I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Randomize