You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
