I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
