don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Randomize
