I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
