But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
