So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
