That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize