I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
soo... how was my night?
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