You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
