quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
