We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize