I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
