My sheets look like a crime scene.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
