so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
