Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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