I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
