so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
You work out of a Hotel?
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Randomize
