Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
