Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
