He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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