margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
