Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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