I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
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