Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize