dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
