whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
