he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
