Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
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