are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
