Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Success! We fucked roommates!
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
