Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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