Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
