Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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