I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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