I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
